A man is struggling with his cheating wife, who excused her infidelity at a weak moment when she wanted to “see if she still had it.”
The woman, who explained to her husband that the attention of the much younger man fed her ego, is begging for forgiveness, but the unforgiving man says she blew “up our entire lives over wrinkles making her sad.”
Keep reading to learn why this husband is asking the Reddit community if he’s wrong for wanting a divorce!
In late February, a man desperate for advice, shared his story on the ‘Am I Wrong’ subreddit, detailing an upsetting situation involving his cheating wife.
Offering the Reddit population some background information, the 39-year-old man said he’s been married to his 33-year-old wife for 10 of the 14 years they’ve been together. The couple shares a daughter, who’s seven.
He explains that his wife joined her sister and a few other girls on a weekend trip, an adult-exclusive party at a resort, which included a lot of drinks.
“I was not worried at all. I have never had a reason to distrust her, she has never done anything to give me a cause for concern,” writes the original poster (OP).
After the girls’ first night away, the author shares that his wife called him in the morning, sobbing and incoherent.
“When I finally calmed her down she told me she had slept with someone else the night before. Supposedly, she met a guy, who SHE approached, they flirted a little, and danced together, and she thought that was as far as it would go,” the husband pens. “But he supposedly just charmed her into a kiss, which turned to making out, which turned to her asking him to walk her back to her hotel, which turned into them having sex.”
This happened multiple times, he says, explaining that her guilt made her stop, but wasn’t enough to keep her from starting again, five times to be exact.
“She says that she kept thinking ‘it was wrong’ but then would think ‘it’s too late now anyway, so might as well carry on’ and basically go through a loop of that,” the OP writes, adding that she also told the “handsome man,” about 10 years younger, that she was divorced.
Wrinkles drive her to tears
The OP writes, “She says she doesn’t know what came over her, and she just wanted to “see if she still had it” but got carried away.”
He adds, “It drove her ego crazy, and that was when she decided to kiss him.”
Looking for answers and allowing his wife enough grace to hear her out, the man asked why she needed to prove to herself that “she still had it.”
“She says since she hit 30, she’s been self-conscious of her aging. That when she spots a new wrinkle or something it drives her to tears. She said that chatting to the guy made her feel young again, and she latched onto that.”
Loop of lies
In addition to betraying her husband and deceiving the stranger about her marital status, the woman also lied to her sister, who she was sharing the room with. Claiming she needed sleep, her sister spent the night in another room with the girls, unknowingly allowing the wife to bring the stranger back to her bed.
“They apparently had no idea she’d even gone home with him. They saw them talking but thought nothing of it,” he writes, sharing that her sister, who is furious over what she did, is calling him since she learned the wife was booted out of the home.
But, grappling with the pain of her infidelity, he says, “I just want them all to leave me alone.”
He writes, “I want to leave her. She’s begging me not to, offering marriage counselling, never going out again, never drinking again etc etc. I’ve always been a one chance sort of guy. I just told her to go f*** herself and have been ignoring her.”
After sharing what happened with his mother, she advised her son to “forgive her.”
But he’s still not sure what he’ll do. “She is staying at her mother’s house while I decide what I want to do. She begged me not to make her leave, but she did when I said it was the least she could do after blowing up our entire lives over wrinkles making her sad.”
‘Divorce her’
Begging Redditors for support, the OP asks, “…I feel like I’m insane. Am I wrong for not even considering forgiving her?”
Netizens jumped in with support, offering their advice on the unfortunate situation.
“You are not wrong. If all it took were a couple drinks and a charming guy to get her to throw away her relationship and her family, it [isn’t] worth it” writes one.
Following the same sentiment, a second shares, “You’re not wrong at all, she broke your trust. Now every time she goes anywhere will she do this again? And she didn’t have sex with him 1x she told you it was multiple times.”
A third says, “Cut your losses and move on. As you noted she pursued him…it’s likely it’s not a one off if she was that cavalier, [she] so easily disrespected your marriage even lying about the status. Hours of cheating is not a one-time ‘mistake.’”
Lastly, the man explains he’s “still reeling,” and that this daughter is safe from the drama, believing “mummy is still on holiday.”
“She told [the stranger] that she was going through a divorce. Time to make an honest woman of her and divorce her,” adds another Redditor.